Acceptance

I have been struggling and wrestling with my thoughts trying to come up with a opening for this entry, but my mind just kept coming up blank. I want to go into depth about something I mentioned in my previous blogs. It is something that can work for you and somehow, eventually, work against you. Looking back at my childhood and how my mom was so accepting of me even though I showed very little characteristics of cerebral palsy, the people and community saw me as a “normal” kid, and the friends I had included me in outside events and social activities I feel very blessed to have that positive experience.

Unlike other children that were not accepted by their families or their peers for not being tall enough, for being too fat, maybe because of the color of their skin, because of their certain disability, or just because there was something very little different about them I am very fortunate to have been raised in such a positive environment. A good surrounding gave me encouragement to thrive physically. My doctor, Sal Bernstein who passed away last year, gave me all the encouragements in the world to do what ever I wanted. So being accepted can make a world of difference and also can be a great motivator. The key outcome of acceptance, to the self, is being loving and happy with who you are.

“Self acceptance leads to a new life with new possibilities that did not exist before because you were caught up in the struggle against reality. People have trouble accepting themselves because of a lack of motivation. Some have this misconception that if you are happy with yourself you won’t change things about yourself. This isn’t true, you don’t have to be unhappy with yourself to know and actively change things you don’t like. Acceptance could be called the first step in change.” [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acceptance]

I have yet to find something, anything, to back up my thoughts when I mentioned that acceptance can work against you. If I am the first, which I don’t think I am; let’s see how this plays out. I believe one can be too accepting with the self that it hinders their success or motivation. In my blog entry titles: “Taking a turn” I talked about the downhill spiraling of my physical condition, how I had herds of doctors trying to find the missing link and concluding there was nothing wrong reserving to accept that the condition I was in was acceptable. I also mentioned that I was still accepted by my family, friends and the community in which I lived as being included. One of the main points I was trying to point out in that blog is how I was so accepting of myself after all that commotion. So accepting that I didn’t thrive. I didn’t find the need to keep myself motivated. I became very self-cautious. I didn’t know what I could do.

By now, I hope, you can grasp my argument that being too acceptant of yourself can have a negative effect of the self. It took me a very long time to figure this out. Now it is time to fight back and say what Rick Hoyt says "CAN".